Shaving you bald loser bic razor

HA! So you thought you had the right to have hair, and lots of it. Skipping the electric trimmers, it's time to go full bald Mr. Clean! I have my assistant shave you, while I watch. I see all your flaws, no matter how much I want to encourage your new head, I just can't stop giggling of all the nasty things that come to life when your hair is gone. You are straight ugly! Scary, and you look horrible. Good!