Cornuto dal tuo amico gotico

I know I said I'd spend some time with you this evening but... Well I had a better offer. I have something for you to do while I'm away though, I'm going to chain you to the stove so you can make me something nice to eat when I get back. Something nice for me and my girlfriend, yes that's my better offer... I know you feel threatened by her, I mean she is better than you in every single way so I understand why you'd feel like that, but well what can you do about it?