You will give me that promotion

Hey Boss! I've been working here a really long time now, and I'd really like a promotion... You keep knocking me back though and I had no idea why until I over heard someone hinting you'd promote me if I had sex with you... Is that true? You could get into a lot of trouble for saying that you know? I really do want that promotion though... But I'm not going to spread my legs for you, I think you should bend over your desk and take my huge strapon instead, there's no getting out of this either because I know everybody will back me up if I report you for being a pervert... So I guess I will be getting that promotion after all!